The Positive Power and Influence Programme allows delegates to practise their influence skills using sometimes unfamiliar styles and behaviours. The core influence styles are persuading, asserting, bridging and attracting, and each style has certain behaviours associated with it. We looked to the silver screen to pick twelve examples of influence in action. Style: Bridging Behaviour: Disclosing Movie: Some Like It Hot Jack Lemon attempts to disclose his way out of marrying a millionaire.   Style: Attracting Behaviour: Sharing Visions Movie: Henry V Kenneth Branagh shares inspiring visions to prepare the lads for Agincourt.   Style: Persuading Behaviour: Reasoning Movie: The Ladykillers Alec Guinness reasons with Katie Johnson, hoping to influence her from going to the police.   Style: Attracting Behaviour: Finding Common Ground Movie: Jaws Richard Dreyfuss and Robert Shaw share scar stories.   Style: Bridging Behaviours: Listening & Involving Movie: 12 Angry Men Henry Fonda bridges with Jack Klugman to get the low down on flick knives.   Styles: Asserting/Persuading Behaviours: Stating Expectations, Proposing & Reasoning Movie: Dr Strangelove George C. Scott seeks to influence Peter Sellers into an all-out attack.   Styles: Persuading/Bridging Behaviours: Reasoning & Listening Movie: When Harry Met Sally Billy Crystal reasons that men and women can never be friends.   Style: Attracting Behaviour: Finding Common Ground Movie: The Princes Bride Cary Elwes and Mandy Patinkin find common ground during a balletic sword fight.   Style: Persuading Behaviours: Proposing & Reasoning Movie: The Hunt For Red October Alec Baldwin proposes that a rogue sub captain may be trying to defect.   Style: Asserting Behaviour: Stating Expectations Movie: Office Space Gary Cole states his expectations to Ron Livingston.   Style: Bridging Behaviours: Listening, Involving & Disclosing Movie: Dr Strangelove Peter Sellers attempts to bridge over a nuclear...

Feedback is an essential ingredient in maintaining your work relationships, and yet it remains an undervalued skill, writes Jonathan Scott. People often assume they are good at giving and receiving feedback. In reality it’s something many struggle with, and avoiding it can lead to dysfunctional blocks forming in your internal and external working relationships. Some people are so uncomfortable about giving negative feedback, they either withdraw from it altogether, or hide negatives amongst so much positive feedback that it fails to have any impact. Others fail to give positive feedback for fear that they will come across as patronizing. Instead they focus on what can be improved, this can quickly lead to people becoming defensive or attempting to justify their behaviour. There’s no quicker way to put up a barrier between yourself and the other person. The trick with feedback is to be open, honest and direct. That doesn’t mean being overly assertive, but on the other hand, you shouldn’t be afraid to state your views, or be afraid of hearing from others. Nicola Lincoln has spent much of the last 14 years running the Positive Power & Influence Programme, where fostering an atmosphere of constructive feedback between delegates is a vital part of the learning. Nicola says: “It’s important, when receiving feedback, to understand that your impact is in the eye of the beholder. It’s how it felt rather than what was meant that is remembered. Let’s say someone tells you that during a meeting you were overly aggressive. You may strongly disagree. And that may not have been you intention, but regardless of your intent, the fact is to that person you have come across as aggressive. Remember that your impact isn’t all in what you say. You could have sounded calm, but perhaps body language – leaning forward, or clenching your jaw perhaps – lead the other person to feel you were being aggressive.” With practice, these tips can help turn feedback from a behaviour you shy away from, to a valuable skill in terms of your influence on others. And if handled correctly it can help you defuse dysfunctional working relationships. Giving feedback 1. Be timely: Give your feedback as soon as possible after the event.  2. Be specific: Describe specific behaviours and reactions, particularly those they should keep and those they should change. 3. Be descriptive, not judgmental: Describe the consequences of others’ behaviour in terms of its impact on you. 4. Own your feedback: Speak for yourself, not others. 5. Be brief: Don’t waffle. Identify one or two behaviours that you wish to comment on, and be direct about how it effects you. 6. Balance your feedback: Be positive about what they do...

You’re all in the meeting to achieve something similar, and just reminding people of that fact can help you overcome roadblocks, writes Nicola Lincoln. If you feel that a meeting is beginning to become bogged down, if the atmosphere is darkening and positions solidifying, it’s important to do something to get over the impasse. Rather than re-stating your position, rather than staying locked in debate, you need to step back from the deadlock and try to change the atmosphere. It’s time to find common ground, to try and enthuse the room with your shared goals, rather than your differences and sticking points. As a nation we’re not always the best at finding common ground. We’re brought up to debate, to stay in the debate, until we win the debate. But there are times when such a single-minded approach won’t work, and will only lead to more delays. Here are three approaches you can bring to a meeting to help reinvigorate the group. 1. Common agenda If you feel the meeting is beginning to sink into the detail, step back and think about why you are all there. What is it you have in common? You must have a common agenda by the very fact that the meeting is taking place, and sometimes, just reminding everyone of that fact is enough. 2. Highlight agreement The whole problem with staying in a state of logical debate, of comparing and contrasting positions, is that it it will only highlight where you disagree, rather than where you agree. Take a moment to stop looking at the sticking points, and remind everyone of the specific points on which you are already agreed. This can be as simple as using phrases like ‘It seems like we’re agreed on this . . .’ or ‘While we disagree on this, we do agree that . . .’ 3. Generate enthusiasm The third tactic is to generate enthusiasm. Talk about how you and the group are feeling about the project – where you are now and where you could be in six months time. Again, you’re all in the meeting for some kind of shared goal, so use open language and phrases to generate a sense of togetherness. In short: enthuse about the future. Think of phrases such as ‘Wouldn’t it be great if we all achieved . . .’ or ‘Just imagine where we could be in six months time. . .’ Talking about the future in this way, attracting others to your shared vision, can help defuse negative tension over the hurdles that seem to be in the way, and help people feel a more determined attitude to overcoming the problems. In the Positive Power &...

After joining Chartwell Learning & Development, Jonathan Scott attended the 5-day Positive Power & Influence Programme at Rowhill Grange Hotel. Here’s what happened . . . Day 1 Before recounting my experiences on this programme, I should explain that the publishing houses I’ve worked for in the past rarely had the budget or inclination to invest in any kind of training. The last course I attended, well over a decade ago, was ‘Advanced Grammar 2’. I’ve never experienced any kind of learning that focuses on influence, leadership or effectiveness. So, at just after 9am on Day 1, I felt like a total beginner, and had the sweaty palms to prove it. During the introductions it became clear we were a very international group – Ireland, Belgium, Germany and Britain were represented, there was a Zimbabwean working in Johannesburg, and an Indian working in Abu Dhabi. The first day on the Positive Power & Influence Programme was taken up with the three facilitators introducing us to the models that underpin PPI. First came the balance beam – the concept that everyone in the workplace has to balance meeting their own business objectives with maintaining their work relationships. If you’re the kind of person who prioritises business objectives, it’s likely that you may follow these goals, sometimes at the expense of a working relationship. On the other hand if, like me, you tended to prioritise relationships with colleagues, this can sometimes be to the detriment of workplace targets. Then we moved to the Situational Influence Model that sits at the heart of the programme. In short, the message is that to be an effective influencer, you should not rely on one dominant style, but apply specific styles that are best suited to each influence situation. We were then taken through the ‘push’ styles (asserting and persuading), the ‘pull’ styles (bridging and attracting), and finally disengaging. There were three practical exercises during the course of Day 1: ‘Consensus Decision Making’, ‘Share Bargaining’ and ‘Energising Yourself & Others’. All three were filmed so we could review our performance afterwards, which, though excruciating, was very valuable for seeing just how you came across. The last was a nerve-wracking exercise for anyone uncomfortable about speaking in public – 10 minutes to prepare a 2-minute presentation on a subject we were passionate about. Subjects varied from agricultural engineering, to sailing, to 12 Angry Men. The point of all three, aside from being our first attempts at persuading, asserting, bridging and attracting, was to get into the rhythm of giving open and honest feedback to one another. Throughout the exercises we had to grade our colleagues’ performance – what they did well, what they failed to do,...

Every worker from every sector will, at one time or another, have endured a long and seemingly pointless meeting, writes Nicola Lincoln. Throughout, as you watch your working day slip away, you ask yourself ‘what am I doing here?’ or ‘should I be adding something?’ Many people I work with admit to me how they often feel completely swamped by meetings. They spend half their working lives trapped in meetings, the other half preparing for yet more meetings. And too often they find themselves in meetings where their presence is at best questionable, at worst, utterly superfluous. It all eats time, and you can find yourself constantly on the back foot, working through a chock-full diary, punctuated by periods of breathless catching-up when you’re finally back at your own desk. Forbes’ Christopher Frank recently estimated that, with people admitting to spending two to three days of the week in meetings, the weekly cost of meetings for a 10-person team is around £14,783. Whether it’s a decision-making, information-sharing or general brainstorming session, there are questions you can ask yourself before you step through the doors, which will help improve efficiency and avoid time-wasting. All it takes is planning and influence. Indeed if you put these four steps together, it should be possible to halve the amount of time you waste in meetings.  1. Do some research When there’s a meeting scheduled, find out why you are expected to be there. When the original research that formed the basis of the Positive Power & Influence Programme was carried out, it was discovered that the most effective managers and influencers were those that went into situations with clear objectives. They know the people they need to influence, and what it is they seek to gain from them. You need to go into the meeting knowing its purpose and what you want from it. What do you hope to walk away with? Who else is going to be at the meeting? Who are you seeking to influence?  2. Make brief proposals The two keywords here are clarity and brevity. People often waste time. They tend to talk around the project or problem that forms the basis of the meeting. They might not even get to any kind of proposal at all – they will just talk and talk about the general situation, hoping and waiting for a solution to present itself. Have a positive proposal, keep it clear and keep it brief, and you will be much more likely to gain support.  3. Give persuasive rationale It helps to go into a meeting thinking/anticipating questions from everyone else in that meeting, and answer them before they’ve even been asked. If you know the...